A little half-assery

Remember that awesome wheelchair elevator that I bragged about? Yeah... turns out, it wasn't all that.

I found a buyer, a wheelchair elevator dealer of sorts, who promised me $1000, sight unseen. He showed up with a helper and a trailer, really, a nice guy. But one look at the lift and his response, "oh, it's older than I thought, and it's been painted" and dang it if I couldn't get it to work. But he said things were slow and wanted to have something for his guys to do so they could make some money. This lift would be a good project. So he generously gave me $200 and proceeded to remove it. Which left me with this:

Nice cone right? That's not dangerous at all, or hideous. So I put it on the When-We-Work-on-the-Front-of-the-House list, which I predicted would be this summer, ha! Weeks turn to months and I had pretty much put this out of my mind. Until it became the neighborhood jungle gym.

My street has lots of kids, under 10, with no where to play. And this open porch wall is awful enticing. Oh, it's good for games of chase when you run up the stairs, leap off the wall and hope you don't get tagged. Or practicing skateboard tricks. Or throwing a ball through, which of course slams into the metal security door (equally atrocious) and I think we're having an earthquake.

This had to stop. Against my core being, I became that adult completely annoyed by the sound of children laughing. Not because I don't think kids are great, but because I know it preceeds the sound of children crying, inevitable because somebody always gets hurt. The cone is useless.

I gave a couple half-hearted efforts at letting everyone know I did not approve. I got their names, I know where you live, I said. And once, I think I even managed to scare them! Oh, this does not make me like myself.

We have a quote from Bob to fix the wall, and I hope to do this in the next month or so. But for now, I needed a temporary solution. Plants! I've been looking for an excuse to buy horsetail, it's so modern, grows quickly, makes a great screen. I spent a couple days thinking I'd build a box. Then I got lazy and went to Ikea. I came across these decent galvanized pots and said, that'll do! I ended up with this:

Let's not even pretend okay? That's pretty lame. Maybe they'll fill in quickly? Or better yet, it's added motivation to get Bob over here and fix this thing. It's not a bust, I love the pots and the horsetail and have other places for these once it's all said and done. The best part, it works. Oh, I had a little crowd around me during installation. "What kinds of plants are those?" "Why are you putting that there?" And the little Eddie Haskell of the group, the ring leader, "can I help you lift it, Miss Tonya?"

Oh, I see right through you mister.

Starting what I can't finish

Sigh... I hate admitting that this summer has been a bust, house-progress-wise anyway. We've been bogged down with work work, you know, the kind you get paid for (supposedly). But the other day, I had a window, an overcast Saturday morning that I simply could. not. spend. at my computer.

I wanted some physical labor. A project that would shock the system. I'm not lying when I say 12 hours a day is spent in a chair, on a couch. I don't go to the gym. This house is my physical fitness! So I picked a project that's been on the to-do list since the beginning.

In theory, it doesn't sound all that hard and it's timing isn't critical so I knew I could start and not finish immediately. I'm talking about that little strip of weeds between my house and my neighbor. The goal: a level surface that grades away from the house and instead of weeds, there is a weed barrier covered in crushed granite, maybe some square pavers just for kicks.

Behold:

See what I'm talking about? That doesn't look so bad. But those weeds get tall, and the neighboring cats, well, you can imagine. Besides all that, this area isn't flat. It's higher than the base of my house and is mounded the entire length. To help with drainage, it needs to be lowered and ideally graded towards the fence which has a nice concrete lip that could act as a guide for running water.

I busted out the weed whacker and gave it a go. That thing terrifies me, can I just say? A lot more than weeds come out of there and I swear I'm gonna lose an eye. I thought I was doing good in my boots, but glasses really should be worn too. Next time.

And then the hard part. Start digging. This ground is compact. Like, a lot. And it's full of debris; rocks, broken old pipe, bits of glass. I got no where fast.

And I got tired. And whiny.

And really hot. I quit.

Let's just call this Stage One. I may have covered 15% of this project, at best. Oh well. Mike wants in on it anyway. Just you wait, honey, this project is a killer!

Working on an herb garden

While the kitties entertain themselves...

{Orange chomps kitty grass first thing after breakfast}

{Roosevelt, taunted by the squirrel who casually plops nuts on his head, does nothing}

I have been toiling away at the neglected left side of the back yard. There we have a nice rectangular border which once housed some sad little rose bushes. Roses are lovely and all that, but not really my thing. Besides, I really want the back gardens to be hard-working and roses are just so... LEISURELY. So I gave them away. Literally, a post on craigslist was flooded with requests. In the end they were excavated by a landscape architect. How perfect.

What I want is an herb border. I want it for food. I want it because it smells amazing. I want it because this is California and it's what. we. do. It's just cool. And I want it to be a nice mix of herbs and decorative plants. Like papyrus:

I have wanted giant papyrus ever since I saw them during a photo shoot for work. They scream California to me (even though they are from Egypt). I suppose my fascination stems from being a midwestern import. The crazy prehistoric plants they have all around here are new to me. Other obsessions: giants ferns and black bamboo. Once I saw hedges made of geraniums. What?! In my hometown (Rockford, Illinois) geraniums are reserved for your grandmother's porch pot. NOT a hedge!

Anyway, I wanted papyrus and I wanted it to be the centerpiece of my herb border. Papyrus likes to sit in water. I do not have a pond, have no plans for a pond and I worried this might be an issue. The internet assured me I could grow it in pots, just no holes for drainage. Pots are best anyway because this plant is invasive, the same as bamboo. I set out for pots and found three amazing black plastic pots at Ikea, two large for papyrus and one small for mint (also invasive).

Then the deal of all deals, two giant papyrus for $14.99 each at Home Depot. I squealed. I had only seen this plant at boutique nurseries with hefty price tags. I snatched them up and wow, they are quite the showstoppers. People asked me about them as I walked to the register, people asked me about them as I walked to my Jeep. And people watched in humor as I set them in the back seat, sticking out the window. I laughed too.

They fit just right in my pots and I adorned them with two variations of potato vine, a purple and a vibrant green for color.

Then I could start to build the border. The papyrus took top position at two midpoints of the box. Mint was then placed in between but off-center. Some of my herbs are already nice little plants, including Mint, Thai Basil, Basil and Curled Parsley. Others I started from seed and they aren't quite ready for the ground:

Here we have Rosemary, Thyme, Oregano, Sage and Red Basil. I also started some Catnip for the kids. I chose my herbs somewhat based on usage and some for color. The garden can be a little bit leisurely, all work and no play makes a dull border!

While I was at it, I fancied up my hanging basket. The alyssum is supposed to be good for pest control and it smells fantastic.

Here it is, hard at work growing to disguise my old fence. What you can't see is the Kangaroo Paw to the left and what will be a giant fern all the way to the back. Oh my goodness, I love it. Papyrus is right out of a fantasy, a little bit of The Neverending Story here in my backyard